Just a Thought...

I remember when I told you I hated you
I meant It.
Ever since that night
I’ve hated everything,
Everyone.
I remember sitting by the phone
My fingers tangled tighter than my shoe strings.
You didn’t call, even though you said you would.
I had made you a gift that day,
Fathers day was always so special to me.
To you.
I remember when mom stumbled through the door, around midnight.
I was still waiting,
So patient.
I asked when daddy was coming home.
Her stare was broken,
Broken into countless pieces.
Pieces to the puzzle that to this day remains unfinished,
Unsolved.
She still waits for you.
So patient.
Too patient.
Her breath raining that repulsive stench,
Vodka, whiskey, brandy,
Take your pick.
I won’t wait though.
Impatient you could say.
Impatient of cheaters.
Deserters.
Liars.
I’ll be fine though,
I’ve grasped enough rage to last an ice age.
It’s you I worry about.
What will you do when you wake up,
From your “new” life.
Your “better” life.
What will you do when you finally realize,
That when I told you I hated you,
I didn’t mean it.